Relationships: A commodity worth investing in!

Relationships...we hear about them all the time. They are important in all aspects of our life.  A good friendship can provide an invaluable support system.  A strong family relationship helps you build foundation with which morals and values are taught and learned.  A strong relationship with a spouse or significant other makes you feel more like a complete person.  There are all types of relationships we try to build to enrich our lives and sometimes they take years to build, and sometimes it takes just seconds for them to be destroyed.  The key to building strong relationships with others is not just spending your time with them, but investing your time in them!

The root of all strong relationships is trust.  Genuine trust can not be developed unless you show how much you care by investing your time into the relationship.  When you were a child, who were the first people who invested their time into you?  Your parents of course.  They sacrificed nights out to be at home with you.  They sacrificed much needed downtime after work to help your learn to read a book.  They sacrificed family vacations to take you to a weekend baseball tournament.  They were investing in you.  They were investing money, but more importantly, their time.  Time is one resource we can never recreate.  That's why its more valuable to invest your time more than your money into a relationship.

Relationships are like any stock or commodity.  You invest in them because you want the value of that stock to grow in value for the future.  No one puts money into the stock market hoping it's worth less a year or two from now.  That would be crazy.  But you must invest smart, and with a plan.  The same rules apply for relationships.  You would never invest your time into a relationship with the hope that person means nothing to you in the next year or so.  So again, if you want to create meaningful, valuable relationships you must invest wisely and with a plan.  If you don't have a plan for how you will invest your time, you're just spending it with no return.


Now business relationships are no different.  They require the same, if not more trust on both ends for a partnership to really succeed and thrive.  There are also many different types of business relationships.  Employer-employee, employee-employee, upper management-middle management, etc.  It's vital to any company, team, organization that there is strong trust in the employees that management has the capacity and character to take them in the right direction.  Management has to trust that their employees are carrying out their work in line with the company standards and vision.  I believe the most important relationship in business  starts with a new employee and their direct supervisor or coach, and this is the relationship I want to focus on.

Many times in an office environment, the "new guy" doesn't know a soul in the office.  The first person they meet who can make a positive or negative lasting impression is the person who is responsible for their training and personal development within the company.  This is the person the new person has to feel comfortable with expressing their thoughts, ideas, concerns, problems.  Creating that trust can be a difficult task.  Learning how to naturally invest your time instead of just spending your time with them is something that must be practiced, just like anything you want to be great at.

The best thing I can recommend to anyone when you are trying to invest in someone new is to spend time outside of the office with them.  Make plans to grab a beer with them on a Tuesday.  Invite them over for a Sunday BBQ at your house.  When you show someone that you are willing to spend your time after work, or are willing to spend your weekend time in getting to know them and their significant other, it starts to create the trust you want in your relationship.  But spending time with them isn't enough.  Now is the time to invest.

Spending time with someone over a beer is a great way to get to know someone.  For some reason, a magical barrier comes down when you take the tie off and have a beer in front of you.  But spending time is asking them about the ballgame last night or what they did last weekend. However, investing in someone is asking them what motivates them.  Asking them why they do what they do.  Asking them what their future goals and family plans are.  Asking them how you can help them achieve their goals.  Letting them know your job is to help them with their goals because the team as a whole can't succeed if they don't.  Show them you care first.  Share your passions and dreams first.  Open up to them first and you'll be surprised how they will react to you.  You probably have more in common than you think, but you'll never know if you don't take the time to invest in the relationship.

So take the time out to invest wisely into those relationships you care about and have a gameplan for your investment.  With no solid plan or actions you're not investing, you're just spending aimlessly.